The Value of Grieving

My husband and I went to a memorial service on Saturday and the second I saw the photo of who we were there for, I suddenly and surprisingly burst into tears. My husband was there for moral support and I was so glad he was there. Our friend’s death was a long time coming and I was completely fine until I saw her photos.

An outpouring of memories flew to the surface. The photos made it. SO. Tangible. So real. and I had to process it in the best way I could. I felt a bit self-conscious because it seemed I was the only one so far who didn’t even make it to the pew without the waterworks showing up.

Yet, that’s why we have these things, these memorials and ceremonies. It’s not by accident or for ego. It helps you process, even when you don’t know what the heck you need to process, or that you even need to process it in the first place!

I went through a specific grief ceremony years ago as part of a retreat. But it was specifically for your grief. Sobonfu, an amazing African Ritualist, commenced the ceremonies, and it was amazing how the energy flowed through the room. After the few hours of each and every one of us absolute bawling and hitting pillows, and energy flowing up your spine and out to the front of the room where the energy landed, we stood up, held hands, looked around and marveled at how bright every one was.

Every one was absolutely radiant! And that in itself blew my mind. The darkness was eradicated. Light was what was left. Amazing.

How many of us truly grieve where we give ourselves time to process, and in the ways we need to process it?

🌸 Often we will cram it down because we don’t want to appear weak.

🌺 Sometimes, we ignore it because the feelings are scary.

 🌼 We stop feeling at all because we don’t think we will ever be able to stop crying.

But it’s interesting about crying, yelling and punching a pillow to get it out of ourselves. Even praying up to a higher power, and giving it to someone who can take it. WE NEED TO.

If we don’t allow our body do to what it needs to do to grieve then it might just fester, and pop out at inopportune times. It might even cause chronic pain, stress and anxiety. It might cause separation between you and others you love.

Grieving is a powerful emotion and process but it is beautiful in its way. It helps cleanse the soul, reconcile our desires with reality and can give us a fresh start for our future.

An interesting note here: sad tears actually have a different chemistry than happy tears. We are detoxifying our body. It’s good for us to cry and process it out!

And I have to say, the silver lining of a good cry is a sparkling shining soul that is more present and purged of old stuck stuff that no longer needs to be here. It allows more light to come in.

That’s a good thing in my book.

Bright Blessings to You on your journey!

Until Next Time,